Where I start back at One.
Weigh In: 205 pounds
I guess I faltered big time with my fresh start at Part Deux. I seriously thought that if I started a fresh, in a new place, in a new space, where failure wasn’t looking me in the face that this would be great and fabulous and I’d lose the weight.
WELL.
It didn’t quite work out that way. I’m at the point now where my pants don’t fit. My shirts don’t fit. I’m getting my double chin back with a vengance and I’ve come to the conclusion that unless I get things back on track I’m going to be even bigger than when I started this weight loss journey so many moons ago.
Tonight I weighed in at Weight Watchers. It took all my willpower to go. I knew that I’d gained. I missed last week because I felt like utter crap. I went back to face the music. I gained 5 pounds in 2 weeks.
If only it was as easy to lose it as it was to gain it.
I have to start looking after myself again. Start following the program. Not binging all week and then starving myself on a Monday and Tuesday for the weigh in that night. No. I can’t do that anymore.
I’m depressed with the way I am. I want to be down to 190 again. I want men to look at me and wish they could be with me… but the big thing is I want to feel comfortable in my skin. I don’t feel that way at all right now. I want to change that.
That’s the problem - my body and me… we have a constant fight about what I’m putting in my body. I’ve decided to take control - and learn to eat better, healthier alternatives, and maybe just a little less of the sweet stuff that I soooo much desire (are you listening Chocolate!).